Scott's Top 10 "Scott Moments"

It would be fair to say that my life isn't boring. Not only do I have two rambunctious, crazy dogs but I am married to an equally adventurous and accident-prone husband, Scott. People who know us well would refer to those episodes that could only happen to him as "Scott Moments".  After a dirt biking trip one summer a friend told me he was sure he would be the one to tell me Scott's last words and they would be "watch this". While on vacation in Honduras we were socializing with some other travellers and Scott had been entertaining them with some of his stories. Someone asked Scott what he does for a living, to which he replied that he was an insurance broker. Well everyone thought that was pretty funny and they turned to me and wanted to know what I did for a living. So I replied that I was a workplace health and safety advisor. The group erupted in laughter and they proclaimed that we were the most ironic couple they have ever met. I suppose that might be true. But seriously, it is a really good thing that we have adequate insurance coverage.

I have decided to share some of the most memorable "Scott Moments" that have happened since the year 1999 when we started dating. Scott had already experienced a lifetime of "Scott Moments" before we met, but I couldn't do those events justice as I did not personally witnessed them.

Our family - December 2011

Here are the Top 10 "Scott Moments" (since the year 1999 when we met):

1. Not long after we started dating Scott came home from a day of skiing at Fernie with chest pain and a lot of difficulty breathing. He has asthma and had assumed he was having an asthma attack. He just wanted to go to bed, but I insisted on taking him to the hospital. When you go to the emergency room and say you are having trouble breathing you go straight to the front of the line. Within minutes he was on oxygen and being examined. Only a few minutes later the thoracic surgeon arrived and started asking Scott questions and wanted to know when he had hit his chest. Scott said that he had not hit his chest but had planted his poles while skiing and his arms were jerked back. As it turns out, while his arms were being forcefully ripped behind his body he tore a hole in his lung and it collapsed. The doctor said it was the type of injury they usually see with a blow to the chest such as hitting your chest on a steering wheel in a car accident. The air from the lung had filled the mediastinum (chest cavity) and we could feel air bubbles in his neck. The doctors wanted to keep an eye on Scott overnight, but didn't want to admit him, so instead they decided to put him in the only quiet area of the ER, the psychiatric room with padded walls. They also gave him Demerol to help with the pain.  While he was getting settled in the psych room, and going between various levels of consciousness due to the pain killers, he suddenly opened his eyes wide, sat up and said (in a slurred voice) "I LOVE YOU!" And that was the first time he said he loved me. Awww! How romantic.

2. While we were engaged to be married Scott decided to go mountain biking with my cousin. They hadn't been gone long when they came rushing in the front door, Scott covered in blood. The story goes that while they were getting their bikes ready in the parking lot, Scott had been hopping curbs and went over his handlebars. While we were examining his roadrash to decide if he needed a trip to the ER, we commented that a wound on his abdomen looked pretty deep and was gaping (sort of like a bullet wound). When we took a closer look someone commented that it looked as though there was something in the wound. Scott stuck his finger in there and pulled out a pebble about 1 cm in diameter. We decided to take him to the ER for first aid and stitches. For reasons I don't understand the ER nurse thought it would be best to give Scott the stitches without anesthetic.

3. On our first wedding anniversary we went camping in Fernie. While Scott was cutting firewood he chopped the axe into his hand. So we celebrated our first anniversary in the ER waiting for Scott to get stitches. 

4. Our 4th trip to the ER was because he sliced open his finger on a steak knife when loading the dishwasher. He went up to the desk and asked the intake clerk if she thought he needed stitches to which she replied "I can't tell you if you need stitches". He then showed her the cut and she said "you need stitches go sit down". Since that day I have stopped accompanying Scott to the ER when he needs stitches. If he is conscious and not bleeding profusely he can drive himself there. Such a caring wife right?!

5. One day when Scott was walking Samson off leash in the field behind our house Samson was running around and wouldn't come back. Scott decided to get Sam's attention by throwing a rock near him, but the rock ended up hitting Samson on the leg. Scott swears he didn't do it on purpose! The next day I had to take my dog to the vet and make up a story that we didn't know how Sam got a puncture wound on his leg.

6. While waiting at the beach for the dive boat to pick us up in Costa Rica, Scott jumped into the water to cool off and landed in a swarm of jelly fish.  The Costa Ricans thought it was hysterical and said they had never seen it so bad before.

showing off his jelly fish stings

7. While ice climbing the left compound gully in Waterton a few years ago Scott decided to use his axe to make me a shelf to stand on while belaying the next pitch. As he was chipping the ice away with the axe his hand slipped and the axe hit me squarely on the knee. 

this is a mountaineering axe not an ice climbing axe, but it will give you an idea of

what the spike looked like on the axe that Scott hit me in the knee with - at the time we
only had one set of ice tools and had borrowed a set from a friend which is a good thing
because the spikes on Scott's axes are much sharper

the gully we were climbing when Scott hit me on the knee with his axe, we weren't 

at the top when the accident happened but to get back to the truck we still had 3 rappels 

followed by a 30 minute hike

8. In the fall of 2011 Scott took up bow hunting. While practicing his "bow hunting skills" in the garage one evening the bow string hit his forearm (with about 60 lbs of sudden force).

Scott's forearm about 3 days after the bow incident

9. In July 2012 Scott was participating in the Magrath I Swam the Dam Triathlon. It had started to rain slightly making the pavement wet and as he turned the second last corner into town at 40 km/hour on his bike he lost traction and wiped out. He finished the rest of the race with road rash and covered in blood and now is a minor celebrity in the town of Magrath for being the guy who crashed his bike and still finished the race.

the paramedics were excited that they had something to do

...and I saved the best for last,

10. Scott got his 15 minutes of fame on the hit TV show America's Funniest Videos. Instead of trying to describe the incident I will just give you a link to the video. 

Scott's Slackline Fail Video

I hope you enjoyed my Top 10 list of Scott's most memorable "Scott Moments". I have joked that living with Scott is like being in a gag reel and now you know why. It was hard to narrow this list down to only 10. I honestly don't think I can even remember every time Scott got stitches, chucked himself off of something, singed his eyebrows starting a fire, crashed a bike, had to get a tetanus shot or tomahawked down a ski hill, but I think you get the idea. 

Scott fell in a hole - instead of helping him I laughed and took pictures